"Egbon, where is your laptop?"
"It stopped working. Probably crashed."
"So what did you do to it?"
"I gave it to your friend , Femi, to help me fix it or copy out my files into his old laptop. He just left here about an hour ago."
"Haa, I'm dead."
"Dead ke? You will not die in Jesus name."
"You need to get it back now."
"Get it back ke? I have deadlines to meet so I need to get my files out asap."
"Haa egbon, you know Femi's brother is a gang member."
"Yes, I know but Femi is your best friend, so he can't touch you."
"Femi himself will kill me."
"Kilode? Kilo se? What happened?"
”Last weekend when you travelled I used your laptop to do a sex tape."
"Sex tape? Why you go put your naked ass with a random girl on my laptop? Are you alright?"
"Egbon, the girl is not random."
"Who is she?"
"She is Femi's girlfriend."

Not to be continued (unless....)

Signed
Olumide Holloway (King Olulu)